Things You See When You Don't Have A Gun

I've been thinking lately about the irritating things that I see on my television set. There are truly horrible commercials that make me wonder who on earth authorizes and pays for them, hideous fashion trends, and copycat shows, to name a few things. It would take me a week to type out an entry about all of the things on television that drive me nuts, but there are a few things that truly make me grit my teeth.

There are all sorts of fashion trends that make me raise my eyebrows, but one that I truly cannot stand is the trend of the last few years of women wearing clothing that is two sizes too small. I see this on most television shows and commercials, not to mention on a daily basis in real life. Ladies, no matter how tiny you are, if the clothing is too small, it makes you look fat. Honestly, it does. I personally know a couple of women who don't have an ounce of fat on their bodies - they are pretty much skin and bones. They have a penchant for wearing clothes that are too small, and they look like they have rolls of fat hanging out all over the place. Then there are all of the larger women I see following this dubious fashion trend. Ugh. Just ugh. And girls, when you are wearing blouses with buttons, it does NOT look good when the shirts are stretched every which way, with buttons threatening to pop off at any second, and there are gaps all the way down the front of the shirt. You might as well take the shirt off and just let the girls hang loose. It really would look better than us having to watch them struggle wildly to make the great escape. Just sayin'.

What is it with all of these paranormal shows doing their investigations at night? In my experience, there are just as many - often more - paranormal experiences during the daylight hours. I'd like to see a crew do an investigation during the day. Not only would they be more likely to have something happen, they'd have the added bonus of being able to see when something was going on.

I find all of the copycat shows very annoying. A unique show comes on television, and within a year or two there are a bunch more cropping up left, right, and centre. It gets boring after awhile, so I really do wish that people would be more original and come up with some different concepts when they decide they want to be on television. There's precious little on television that's half-decent to begin with - it would be so nice to have more original, well-done shows to choose from, instead of all of the hastily thrown together copycat programs.

There are some wonderful, creative commercials on television. IKEA, Volkswagen, Geico, and Telus have given us some fabulous ads to watch. But for every great commercial, there are many absolutely horrid ones. The first that springs to my mind is Always. "Have a happy period" my ass. I rarely let commercials influence my decisions in purchasing products, but I have to say that the Always commercials piss me off so badly that I refuse to purchase anything with that brand name on it. Their commercials are so condescending and demeaning - I don't understand why anyone thought they were a good idea to begin with. Obviously there are women who buy their products, but I am definitely never going to be one of them. I've talked to several other women over the years who also refuse to buy the Always brand because of those commercials. Mind you, I did try their products many years ago, and quite frankly I found them very inferior to other products on the market. So unless they've seriously improved over the years, I don't understand why anyone buys them anyhow.

The Toronto Blue Jays have a particular commercial on television that has my brain going in circles every time it comes on. Not to mention it has the hair on the back of my neck rising and my teeth grinding. I couldn't even tell you what the commercial is about - I hear Superbad start blaring out of the television and my brain scrambles from wanting to resurrect James Brown so I can throttle him, to smashing the television to bits with a baseball bat, to hitting the mute button on the remote control, then back to wanting to resurrect James Brown and throttle him again. Since I am not into playing with necromancy, and I don't own a baseball bat, James and the television set are on pretty safe ground. My most realistic option is hitting the mute button. But I have to say, that gives me NO measure of satisfaction once that horrible song has started up.

I usually enjoy the Geico commercials, and have to give them props for authorizing some very entertaining ads. However, the cavemen commercials totally sucked, in my opinion. I absolutely hated them, and honestly found them a bit offensive. I wasn't thrilled with the commercials with the older gentleman (seemingly a boss) either - the only thing that saved those was the gecko.

Oooh, back to fashion for a moment, then I'm done for now. Another trend that I hate the look of is the low-rider pants and jeans. I've never liked the look of them, and I've always thought that waistbands should be at the waist, not anywhere below it. It's much more flattering. The worst thing about the lower waistlines is more pronounced "plumber's cracks", on both women and men. Plus, I don't need to see what panties, or gods forbid, thongs that people are wearing. If you insist on wearing these pants, then for pity's sake make sure that you wear a top that is long enough to cover them, no matter what position you're in.

I don't know about you, but I certainly feel better for getting all that off my chest! There are certainly things on television that I do enjoy, and I will probably do up a blog entry about them one of these days. As for the stuff I don't like, for now I'll just keep crossing my fingers that we start getting more original shows, that fashion starts focusing on clothing that actual fits and is flattering, and that company owners start showing some intelligence when approving of the commercials that flog their products. I know, it's unrealstic, but a girl can dream, no?